Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Oil and Water

I reached my breaking point.  After being a colicky baby and a tough toddler, Penn has grown so much in maturity over the last year.  Now, Everlee's arrival has him backpedaling and me losing my mind.  The two of them together is like oil and water.  They don't mix.  And my handling of his reactions to her show a side of me I hate.  I never wanted to be that mom.  Quick to temper, frustrating easily, whiny, and saying the word "no" nearly as many times as I breathe.  I am being that mom.  Where has the cheerful Jess gone?

I asked, well, more accurately cried... to three different adults in the middle of a mommy meltdown, to switch their preschool days.  They will start going opposite days after the new year.  That way they are not around each other constantly, and I will have one-on-one time with each of them.  It's a short term solution, obviously.  As Brent told me, "Jess, they are siblings.  We can't keep them apart for the rest of their lives."  Short.  Term.  Solution.  Penn needs me. Just me.  That is the only thing that will bring him back from the dark side.  I will be giving up my volunteer time and solo hours, but right now, regaining a sweet, loving son is far more important.  We've got to dig him out.      

E continues to have the smoothest personal ride.  But, we were not prepared for the shoving, pulling, taunting and all ways of bothering her that Penn conjures up.  Lord help me. I must maintain my sanity.

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

What Recovery?

I can't believe I have been so negligent as not to tell all you lovely people how E is doing.  Her recovery is non-existent. We expected the entire first week to be much like the first 36 hours.  It wasn't. She came home revved up and ready to go.  Back to herself by day three.  She was signing for pizza and other food she couldn't have.  Her appetite was back well before she was enough healed.  We mitted her with socks 24 hours a day for the first week.  We took them off only for meals because she refused to let us feed her.  That's the orphanage in her.  Stubbornly self-sufficient, because she had to be.  The second week through now we mitt her for naps and bedtime.  Thankfully, she doesn't fight us on putting them on.  And we do wrap them in surgical tape for a secure fit.  Although we did not aim to ween her from thumb sucking, I would bet she is cured of that habit since it's been two and a half weeks.  Her follow-up was yesterday and they asked us to mitt her one additional week, since she doesn't seem bothered by it, just for safe measure.  Her mouth looks nearly "normal" now.  The jaw bone is covered in pink gum tissue and the gaps have filled in.  All but a teeny tiny one at the juncture right of her front teeth.  While eating the other night, a pea came through her nose.  B figured there must still be a small gap since a single pea made it up.  Sure enough, the surgeon saw that tiny space not filling in.  She said it may not ever, considering that there was no gum or bone tissue in that space to  sew the palate too.  Makes sense.  It should not affect her blossoming speech, nor her regained diet.  Down the road, after her additional dental surgeries to build the missing bone and teeth, if the millimeter or two gap bothers her, we can connect it then.

Since home, she's celebrated her first Halloween (wearing the same lobster costume the boys each wore their first Halloweens,) met Aunt Krissy, brushed up on her Italian verbs, stepped in sand, gone to the beach for the first time, and grown hair long enough for pig tails.  What recovery?!














I've already sent her back to "school."  The teachers were amazed how she is herself.  She was ready to go back, and Mama was ready to be back into my routine.

I even headed south for an uber quick surprise trip to Florida.  My nephew had his 4th birthday party and my sister-in-law had a baby shower.  Since we move often with the Air Force, we try to make it to as many major events as possible while we live relatively close.  I drove solo to be in attendance since it was a quick turn around. Too many hours in the car for the kids for only two days. Brent stayed behind and appreciated me more when I returned.  *wink*




By the way, I don't know if mitted is a real word, but I'm using it.  She is beyond doing well!